How to Have the Hots for Fabio

Oh, how the snotty have fallen. You may as well give up now because you have indeed become your mother.

See, you used to be an English teacher! You have an MFA in creative writing from one of the best programs in the country! (And why did they let you in? Because you're obviously doing so much with it?)

It all started with not being able to find any new good books to read. And that led you back to your forgotten love of young adult novels. Which led you to Twilight, the book about a normal teenager who falls in love with a vampire. Hot stuff, right? Except it's written by a mormon. So not so much. But you have to admit. You were giggling and blushing all through the darn book. It was making you long to be 16 again and have a mad crush. You did have an awful thing for Lestat...sigh....

But by the time the book ended, you felt downright gypped. Where was the payoff? A couple of kisses here and there and then some nonsense about werewolves. Werewolves? You wanted steamy vampire love!

You've always been a romance novel snob. Your mother used to read them by the truckful when you were a kid. You can remember all the paperbacks with the swooning ingenues on the covers in their billowy skirts and long, flowing tresses. The chiseled alpha male heroes with their roman noses and pirate shirts open to the navel. You'd think you would have stolen them and secretly read them, but your parents apparently didn't believe in censorship (thank goodness) so they didn't end up holding much appeal to you. (The writing was a hoot.)

But now....twenty years later? Hmmmmm. It's embarrassing, but you found yourself in the bookstore this afternoon selecting several man-bedecked covers and hoping nobody you knew saw you. (Not that you're not telling the world now!)

And oh what a guilty pleasure! Why didn't you give in years ago? They're like the marshmallow fluff of the literary world. Very delicious and they rot your brain delectably. You're a convert to the romance of the month club.

Try this at home:
What's the most romantic book you've ever read?